THE MANY FACES OF ANGER
Anger is the most misunderstood of all the human emotions. We tend to think of anger as basically distasteful and abhorrent -- something that we would rather not experience. Actually, I believe that anger is an expression of the self. It is a protection of one’s boundaries. When a
The child soon learns that this kind of expression is unacceptable—that he may, if he continues to express the self in this vein, be in danger of abandonment. Since his survival depends on the adults in his life, he will make determinations about how to be in the world to insure that his needs are met. The child’s self becomes diminished due to lack of expression, and his deep-felt feelings become buried somewhere inside of him.
Since the child’s major developmental task is to grow up, a paradox takes form. As the child strives to flourish and thrive in her confusing world by calculating how to avoid her parents’ disapproval and wrath, her organism struggles to achieve equilibrium and health. And so the expression of anger, this expression of self that has been frustrated and thwarted, pushes
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